Mark 14:32-42

I am struck every time I read this by Jesus' anguish as He prepares for His death. I'm sure He knows the plan. Give yourself up, suffer, die, rise again. He has tried to teach this plan to His disciples several times to prepare them for what was to come. If Jesus were only divine, and not at all human, this turmoil would probably not be so evident. But Jesus was/is fully man. Just as we suffer when we scrape our knees or eat food that is too hot, so did He. He was no more eager to suffer physical pain than any of us are. The body's desire to maintain itself and protect itself was alive and well in Jesus. He had no personal desire to be flogged; he genuinely feared the pain, a pain far worse than the spankings we so greatly fear in our childhood.

 

In light of this, He still says, "Not my will, but Yours." Without even knowing what God is asking of us – without knowing that God intends anything but good for us – we fear to say these words. God's plan for my life might never involve prison, or floggings, or beatings, or torture, or painful death. Why do I act as though I believe God intends for me to experience pain each and every day? Why do I struggle to say, "Not my will, but Yours?"

 

One note of encouragement. Jesus feared pain, too. In other words, God does not despise us for fearing pain. He designed us to hate pain, and in most circumstances we are to avoid it. All God wants is our faithfulness – not a form of courage that scoffs at pain. He wants our obedience for the sake of His kingdom – not as robots, but as people who must trust Him enough to override their built-in (by Him) desires.

 

Father, thank You for not being upset with us when circumstances make us think twice about what You are calling us to do. Thank You also that You reveal Your will clearly enough that we can face great pain when we need to, testifying to unbelievers that there is more to life than personal comfort and safety.